Summary
The problem with most everyday athletes over thirty is that they tend to ask the wrong question when working towards their own personal vision of fitness. The question they start with is “How do I solve my problem?”
Today’s article is all about helping you achieve your fitness goals faster by changing the framework of the question you ask. Change the question from “How can I solve my problem?” to “Who can help me solve my problem?” This subtle difference in mindset can lead to exponentially faster results.
The Sad Reality of Personal Fitness Goals for People Over Thirty
I’ve had a lifetime of conversations that go like this…
Me: “What are you working on right now?”
A.N.Other: “I’m working towards XYZ….”
Me: “Cool. Good luck.”
(Fast forward twelve months)
Me: “How’s XYZ going?”
A.N.Other: “I’ve given up.”
Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. What are you working on now?”
A.N.Other: “I’m working on ABC.”
(Fast forward another twelve months and it’s the same result…Nothing achieved and another year of procrastination, wasted.)
If I had a penny for all the fitness conversations I’ve had over the years that have gone along those lines, I’d probably be a multi-millionaire by now.
The sad reality in fitness is that most people will never achieve their personal fitness goals. They will never achieve their true vision of fitness, and it’s their own fault.
The sad reality in fitness is that most people will never achieve their personal fitness goals. Click To TweetYou may think that’s a bit harsh; however, it needs to be said. And it has nothing to do with anyone being lazy or not being physically capable of doing it.
The problem lies with the uniquely human ability to be master procrastinators. We are the world’s worst at procrastination, and the fastest way to step out of the habit of procrastination is to change how we approach complex tasks.
Instead of asking “How can we do it?” you need to shift your mindset to ask “Who can help me do it?”
Start to Ask WHO, Not HOW
As busy everyday athletes over thirty, life has a remarkable knack of getting in the way. Work, family, kids, hobbies, mini-crises – you name it, it happens.
More importantly, if you’re anything like me, you have a constant stream of ideas and new projects that just keep popping up, which means it makes nearly everything impossible to implement.
I first learned the “who, not how” principle during a business seminar, and over the years, I’ve realized how valid this is for the world of fitness. This holds such truth for me that I refuse to do my own fitness programming anymore.
I have so many fitness ideas running around in my head on a daily basis that I now ask Josh Kennedy to keep me on track, program for me, and test these thoughts out.
We are the world’s worst at procrastination, and the fastest way to step out of the habit of procrastination is to change how we approach complex tasks.Click To TweetWhy? To keep me on track and make sure I stick to one thing, so I can accomplish a particular goal.
When we decide on a particular fitness goal or future vision of ourselves, we get easily caught up in the question “How do I get this done?” Quite simply, we don’t know how to do it; otherwise, we would have achieved it already.
It’s also because some people are afraid of change. Some of us would rather get lost in a world of procrastination. We’d rather spend our valuable time asking how to tackle a complex task because it makes us feel good to say that at least we tried.
By focusing on the “how,” we have to consider the ins and outs of the task at hand. This means sitting down, learning, researching, applying, and testing things out. You name it, we will research it. For some, this is far more interesting than the desired result itself.
However, the problem is that by doing this, we slip into this mode called “procrastination.” In trying to figure out the “how,” it actually takes us further away from the goal at hand.
When procrastination sets in, so does frustration and lack of results, which ultimately leads to most people giving up on their original goal.
Changing the goal entirely and repeating the whole process ultimately leads to even more frustration, setbacks, and potential injury.
But there is a simpler, faster, and better solution to all your problems out there. It starts with the simple rephrasing of the question from “How can I?” to “Who can help me?”
This one simple trick will help you actually implement your vision, get you results, and show you the “How” even faster.
The Everyday Athlete’s Dilemma
Our education system plays a major role in why we ask HOW and not WHO from an early age. The western education system is designed to prepare people for a life of HOW. Children in traditional classrooms around the world are graded on HOW they solve particular problems on their own.
But when you leave school, you need to collaborate and delegate to thrive. In school, they don’t call it collaborating and delegating. They refer to it as cheating.
The education system engrains the HOW question into us and discourages us from asking WHO.
If you want to achieve a perfect vision of yourself or an outrageous fitness goal, you need to overcome old habits and begin to view other humans as an abundant resource meant to help you.
You need to start seeing coaches and trainers as resources to help curate a strong and passionate team around you, to support you and act as your WHOs.
By delegating the HOW and finding the WHO, your results and overall passion for fitness and life will go through the roof because you can remove yourself from the mental weight and obligation of unfinished goals.
This allows you to focus on what’s truly important – your vision of yourself, your fitness goals, and the life that’s happening all around you.
Your Time Is Limited. Why Waste It?
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice.” ~ Steve Jobs
When I was struggling with back pain (for over five years), I focused on the HOW. How do I fix this? What can I do? I spent hours, days, weeks, and months researching and trying to find a way out of the pain. The more I struggled, the more unathletic, frustrated, and overweight I became.
Can you relate? Maybe it isn’t back pain. Maybe it’s losing weight? Maybe it’s being able to run a marathon? Maybe it’s deadlifting more? I think you get the drift.
It wasn’t until I finally had had enough that I saw the light and searched for the WHO to help me with my problem. It was then that things began to change. I traveled to the U.S., and I sought out the best in the industry, learned from them, took their advice and implemented what they were teaching me. Six months later, I was better than ever.
I was ecstatic! I was moving better, and more importantly, I was pain-free. I was able to get on with my life again. But I was so angry with myself. I had wasted five years of my life trying to figure this stuff out on my own.
I will never get that time back. Five years at the peak of my athleticism. That’s the one thing I regret the most, the one thing I’ll never get back. I wish I could go back, shake myself, and tell myself to seek the WHO.
Time is precious—more precious than gold in my opinion.
So, I ask you:
- How much time are you wasting, or have you wasted, in search of achieving your goals?
- What vision do you have for yourself?
- Why haven’t you achieved it yet?
- Do you think it’s time to search out the WHO in your life to make these goals finally become a reality?
- How much of your life are you wasting because you don’t have a WHO in your life implementing your vision?
- How much time are you wasting because you are caught in the minutia of your ideas, trying to figure them out?
As everyday athletes, we all have a constant stream of ideas and new goals that might add massive value to our lives, if they ever get implemented.
As soon as you come up with a big, ambitious goal, your sole responsibility is to ask, “Who am I going to find to implement this in my life?”
It has been an absolute game-changer for me, and I promise, it will do the same for you.
Ultimately, asking WHO, not HOW, has transformed my ability to achieve more in the past two years than I have done in the past fifteen.
Now if an idea comes to me during a moment of wisdom and insight, I can share this with my coach (Josh) and explain why I think it is important. We define measurable criteria for success, or just discuss even if it is worthwhile pursuing. He keeps me on track, keeping the goal, the goal.
Closing Thoughts
Finding your WHO in your life will make your HOW happen faster and cheaper than ever before. It will help bring your health and fitness vision to life without the pain, agony, and heartaches that I experienced.
Your WHO is a coach, a coach who can work with you. A coach who has your back. A coach who is part of your team, driving you to success and keeping you in check when you need it.
Life over thirty is difficult. With all the distractions and the way life constantly gets in the way, it’s important to be smart, driven, and focused with an uncanny ability to remove clutter from your life.
You don’t have time to make the same mistakes you made in your twenties. Time starts to whiz by. Your thirties are creating the foundation for everything in life that’s to come.
In my opinion, the only way to really achieve your goals and make your impact in the world is to build an incredible team of WHOs behind you.
Right now is the greatest time in human history to find your WHOs. The internet is a wonderful place. You can find any number of people to help you get where you want to go.
Find someone who has already done what you’re looking to achieve. Find the right WHO, and you’ll be on the fast track to success. I promise you.
What are you waiting for? Now’s the time to find your coach.
Finding your WHO in your life will make your HOW happen faster and cheaper than ever before. It will help bring your health and fitness vision to life without the pain, agony, and heartaches that I experienced.Click To TweetEvery Journey Begins With a Single Step
In every great movie, the hero embarks on a path that promises adventure, challenges, and finally, achievement. Often, the hero finds a guide that takes the hero under their wing and pushes him or her to the limit. Just think, where would Luke be without Yoda? We are the stars of our own movies. And we all need that guide.
When it comes to fitness, a coach can be your guide to movie hero-type success, and your secret weapon. There are so many benefits to having a personal coach. I would go so far as to say that coaching is a prerequisite for achievement. Period.
Applying the Strength Matters System of Athletic Development to achieve a pain-free athletic lifestyle won’t be easy but it’s guaranteed to work if you follow it. And we’re here to guide you every step of the way.
Are you ready to take that first step?
Apply to take our 30-day challenge today.

