I think that today’s topic is a really important subject that isn’t talked about enough in today’s society. This topic really resonates with me because of my own family experience with some of these issues. In this show, I am talking with Nick Sutherland a psychotherapist who helps men who have reached rock bottom. Nick is passionate about breaking down the stigma regarding mental health. He also has a goal of helping 373 males between the ages of 35 and 45 get off rock bottom. This is the number of guys who commit suicide in Australia each year.
Nick is also the creator of MyndFit a mental strength training program for the mind which helps us become less reactive and in better control. With his psychotherapy, he guides businessmen to lead a more balanced life. He counsels guys who are thinking that there has to be more to life than work. Nick also shares real life examples, techniques, and questions to use when taking control of reactions. Listen in to learn how to take control of your responses and life.
Today’s topics include:
- In spite of a rough beginning, Nick learned that his empathy was a positive trait.
- When Nick’s stepdad passed away, a day before his retirement, Nick decided he wanted to help guys who are overworking.
- Nick hit rock bottom after a traumatic Army hazing experience.
- How Nick’s story and experience helped build his understanding of how strong on a non-physical level we can be.
- As a psychotherapist, Nick has been exploring the aspects of toxic masculinity that presents guys from opening up.
- How reacting to circumstance is like giving your power away and not accepting the reality of the moment.
- Phrase to use: “That’s interesting.” To neutralize your response.
- Exercise: Say cope and experience how it makes you feel. Then say manage and see how it makes you feel.
- Coping is disempowering, but managing is empowering.
- Five Basic Human Needs: Power, belonging, freedom, fun, and survival.
- When basic needs are met we become self-sufficient.
- Nick shares a story about when lifeguards need to punch back and having a sense of survival.
- Helping businessmen lead a more balanced life and the crutches they use including attaching their work and hours to their self-worth.
- The importance of setting boundaries and being healthy.
- Exercise: Take a pen and paper and draw 3 interlocking circles. Label them mental health, physical health, and nutritional health. Score each circle between 1-10. Make sustaining an 8 out of 10 your goal.
- Ask is it sustainable, and is it healthy?
- Making yourself a priority when it comes to all aspects of health.
- Being emotionally self-sufficient and having the right mindset and knowing what you stand for.
- The difference between mental health and mental illness. We all have mental health, we don’t all have mental illness.
- Attachments and emotional trauma and being stuck and toxic and how it affects emotional development.
- Focusing on what you want to achieve not what you want to avoid.
- Changing the label we put on pain and changing the sensation.
- How happiness needs to come from loving yourself unconditionally.
Links and resources:
- MyndFit
- Nick Sutherland Facebook
- Man’s Search for Meaning
- Why Coping Isn’t a Good Thing YouTube
- William Glasser
- Nelson Mandela
- How to make work-life balance work Nigel Marsh
- Nick Sutherland
- FREE Download – Unhelpful Thinking
Quotes:
“We need alcohol to make us feel safe and vulnerable enough to really open up. Which is really sad.” Nick Sutherland
“Every time we react, we give our power away.” Nick Sutherland
“Ideally, people are in the here and now and stop and question the situation before reacting.” Nick Sutherland
